Children and young people are often silenced, unheard and misunderstood in the context of domestic, family and sexual violence. Research claims it can take on average 20 years for someone to disclosure childhood abuse. However, what is not being broadly recognised, is that children who experience trauma and violation, communicate signs of harm through a variety of modes and often as part of a process. Disclosures of harm are more often in the form of behavioural and emotional language and non-verbal cues, rather than through the use of words. The pressing issue, is that adults around them are not noticing, hearing or understanding their language.

Applying a trauma-informed and developmental lens to understanding the ways in which children communicate is essential. The experience of living in fear, harm and violation impacts social, emotional and cognitive development, which affects communicative ability and function. Children can believe they are communicating the harmful experiences, then when no one provides a protective response, they can become confused, withdrawn, discouraged and feelings of insignificance can take hold within their heart and mind. Their entire life trajectory can be significantly impacted.

Unsilencing children and upholding their rights to live free from abuse and neglect is a political, professional, family and community responsibility. Unfortunately, community beliefs and attitudes minimise the widespread effects of family violence and children continue to be unseen, unheard and ignored. The wider community must be educated, so that children and adolescents are no longer silenced. Safety, emotional wellbeing and healing from trauma is more likely to occur when children’s experiences are acknowledged, listened to and validated. Children have a right to be heard and a right to live free from abuse and neglect. It is vital that adults, across all levels of society, notice, listen, understand and respond to their language of harm.